McDonald's almost hired me one time, and I only applied for the job
to meet younger girls. Black girls, Hispanic, white, and Chinese girls,
it says right on the job application how McDonald's hires different
races and ethnic backgrounds. It's girls, girls, girls, buffet-style.
Also on the application McDonald's says if you have any of the following
diseases: Hepatitis a Salmonella Shigella Staphylococcus Giardia or
Campylobacter, then you may not work there. This is more of a
guarantee than you get meeting girls on the street. You can't be too
careful. At least at McDonald's she's gone on the record saying she's
clean. Plus, there's a very good chance she's going to be young. Pimple
young. Giggling young. Silly young and as stupid as me.
Eighteen-,
nineteen-, twenty-year-old girls, I only want to talk to them. Community
college girls. High school seniors. Emancipated minors.
It's the
same with these SUICIDE GIRLS calling me up. Most of them are so young.
Crying with their hair wet down in the rain at a public telephone, they
call me to the rescue. Curled in a ball alone in bed for days, they call
me. Messiah. They call me. Savior. They sniff and choke and tell me
what I ask for in every little detail.
It's so perfect some nights
to hear them in the dark. The girl will just trust me. The phone in my
one hand, I can imagine my other hand is her.
It's not that I want to get married. I admire guys who can commit to a tattoo.
---Chuck Palahniuk, "Survivor"
